This thing called love

I have two friends, a guy and a girl. Lets call the guy Adam and the girl, lets call her Jane. Up until recently, both were in serious relationships. Both were looking to get get married with their respective partners and both were making plans for it. And both were really strong in their faith – Adam had a relationship with God that made a lasting impression on me. With Jane, everything she does always involves God. Her response to every decision would always be to pray.Both had that relationship with God which I could only aspire to one day build.

And just recently, I found out both had their hearts broken – Adam’s girl started drifting apart, Jane’s guy told her off he’s not gonna marry her. Both were left heart-broken, and it just made me realize how fragile our hearts are, why? because just  a couple of months back I was just at their position. I sometimes ask questions such as “how does God know whether this individual is the right one for you?”  or “how do you know whether this is the one?”

People who are in love usually give me the standard cliche answers which typically exemplifies the person’s behaviour and action toward them – being nice, being affectionate, being understanding, being loyal etc. I know this because I too used to justify the health of my relationship through these measurements (nice, affectionate, understanding etc.). We use concepts of how the person makes us feel, or how we catch ourselves pleasantly reciprocating back to the gestures done by the other individual.

But if love is so fragile, and yet we can still use such loose terms (feelings, nice, affectionate) it feels really contradicting. In the past I have written stuff about love,  pathetically trying to define what love really is and just when I think I have finally unlocked the mystery to life’s universe, I fall flat on my face again.

And no matter how much you try to look at love ; be it in a cynical way, or in a positive idealistic way, or even in a practical way, I really believe that love can’t be defined. You can’t really put a finger to it, you can’t really make any sense of it – when it hurts, it hurts far more than the worse toothache you could ever have, if it brings joy, it brings joy beyond anything you can ever buy and be happy about –  And because you can’t make any sense out of it,  I think, that love is really God. God is love.

And if we want to seek love, we must first seek God. Only by seeking the maker can we understand…truly understand what the item is to be sought. Seeking love without God is like seeking something without any meaning. God gives meaning to love. God makes us understand love.  And yes we will feel hurt, we will be heartbroken, we will feel betrayed ; all those risks that is in the clause when we love, but if we have God in our souls, if we believe in an infinite Love, then we can rise up again, we can shake the dust out of it, and we can love again, we can believe in love…despite the fallen nature of men  – because we are loved first by Him. (1 John 4:19) and that’s all that matters…really.